Delight-full darkness

In my despair you share

Great lessons in lessening light

When worry is all that i do

You empty Your Love

So to fill my soul full

That i may have eyes behind eyes i pray

That the womb of my heart

hears You clearly say.






Love lightly

spinning this world

Forest filled Breezes

Feathering Breath


sweetening Promise

Delight-full darkness.

Atmospheric perfumes of old

Hazrat Inayat Khan Vol VI p. 205

‘for the person who as attained to the mystery of Sadhana (detachment from worldly things) there is nothing in this world which cannot be attained, all is within his reach, his power, his grasp’

grasping beyond all that is spoken

transforming insides in complete

focussing tight rightly pray to be opened

by boundaries way out of reach.

find nothing and all in acorns so small

where both Beauty and horror is riven

thorns stemming foes as rosebud unfurls

perfumaries for the forgiven.

atmospheres calling unseen and untold

pure waters hydrating dryness of form

seedlings compost in saplings of old

returning to unfurl in soft streams of dawn.

Turning new leaves to:

re route this wait

enlighten fear through

unloosening gates

empty and clearing

without and within

actively resting

and as we refresh and uncling.

oiling Your palm


pausing I pour

 this way and that


i may disappear

within Your honeyed


fertile and pure


sweet pulsing elegance

in Grace-fuelled dhikr


soft green shoots of

Eastern Sun Light

 palm pressing fresh fruits

needing till ripe with

Great goodness seeping

through pulp, pith and kin

earthly distinctions

composting in Him.


the above was written in response to:

The Head of The Prophecy (6,21-8,27)

‘It is like a palm shoot whose dates dropped around it. It produced buds and after they grew, its productivity dried up.

It certainly would be good if you produce new growth now. You would certainly find it.’

Know Yourselves (12,17-13,25)


‘Be eager to harvest for yourselves a head of the grain of life that you may be filled with the kingdom.

Do not be proud because of the light that enlightens. Rather, act towards yourselves as I myself have toward you. ’

(quoted from ‘The secret book of James’  which is the first chapter in The Nag Hammadi Scriptures edited by Marvin Meyer published by Harper One in 2007)


Next blogs: The Gospel of Truth.


June 07

‘The path is to empty ourselves of false divinity, to deny ourselves, to give up being the centre of the world, to discern that all points in the world are equally centres.’ Simone Weil quoted in S G Reynolds Living within the mind of Christ, p206

And so with this tiredness comes fuzzy thought, aching eye sockets and another urge to close in on myself forever. The day was perfectly mellow, three counselling sessions; recovery from depression, living with chronic conditions and Aspergic anxiety, all held within the context of loving relationship suspended in a cool, quiet and highly polished room overlooking a spectacular garden and light grey lake once owned by an importantly busy 17th century general practitioner.

And now, after a night of fitful spare bed room sleep, I am too tired for speech, I can only immerse in the silent scratch of you, my most fountainous, most forgivingly favourite pad and pen………….

before each word


within silence
still these chattering noises.

how come?

how can these bedding down of desires still circulate
however much I meditate?
how can this resistance to wrest thoughts into Nothingness
be so beyond this mortal’s reach?
where are the rest of these roads to self-forgiveness
this richness to silence I so often seek?
this portal-less absence
these city curbs to this course over thinking
and throwing of verbs into the gutter all

searching for answers
to co-here and now to be
truly within a This-ness
fully beyond this heart and flesh,this body
this dirt ridden spleen of regret.

to coalesce, yes, to immerse I guess
in Breaths own breathing
in the orange and yellowings and driftings of
green as this vessel of vessels
these blood-lit pores, wait for
for wholeness to appear within the weightless of time.

for mists to swirl and fulfil in-between
flesh full narrations and this body most slain
to refresh into chanting enchantments again
to yearn for the Deepest of Breath.

‘do your breathing most breathing most breathing most best’

oh oh yes,

of course, off course I am surrounded again
succumbed once more to this thinking most brain.

Oh silence
soothe these aching taught abs
freed from these needs for solution



You distanced dream valley
with softening tones
whisper Loves balm
to these hum-drumming drums
born of a presence that never quite comes.

‘The action of grace in our hearts is silent and secret.’ Simone Weil Waiting on God page. 7